Being gay in a largely straight world comes with a special brand of discrimination that stretches from "I hate gay people" to "I hate feminine gay men" and "I like gay people, but I don't think their marriage should be the same as mine."

You don't need me to tell you that it's complicated.

But every now and then, I'm happy to hear enlightened opinions from straight folks who support gay marriage… a number that's growing according to a new poll by CBS and the Washington Post.

After all, straight people need to rationalize our right to marriage because they are capable of obtaining one themselves. That process can lead to all kinds of explanations, and one I stumbled across today is one of my favorites yet.

Alex McCord and Simon van Kempen of the Real Housewives of New York discussed the issue with Village Voice writer Michael Musto.

McCord shared a story about a gay friend who was married in Massachusetts and was later offered a dream job out of state where his husband couldn't have gotten health benefits.

Oddly, I felt van Kempen--who's often the more outlandish of the two--had the best point:

I came to the states almost 10 years ago for a three-week business trip. I met Alex. Fortunately for me, the Alex I met was Alexandra, not Alexander. I moved to the states and eventually got my U.S. citizenship. But if it was Alexander, our love would have been screwed. It's ridiculous that in 2011, there are people split up who can't live their lives because of the government!

I think van Kempen really sums up the happen-stance of love that applies to gay and straight people, and beyond that, how that happen-stance can lead to unfortunate legal consequences for those who happen to fall in love with a person of the same gender. Bravo!

How do your straight friends rationalize your sexuality? If you're partnered, how do they explain similarities or differences in the relationship? Do they see your partnership, if not legally equal, as comparable to their own?

Top photo: Alex McCord and Simon van Kempen of the Real Housewives of New York talk equality with Michael Musto (courtesy NOH8 Campaign)